At work [God Loves Kids] there is a kitchen with a fridge where people can store their lunches/dinners and what have you.  Attached to the front of the fridge is a memo that states that every Friday the fridge will be gone through and stuff that isn’t dated will be thrown out.  Also, it says something about putting your name on your items.  Anyways, I’ve found that although my employer reserves the right to throw stuff away on Fridays, they don’t always do it.  As a result I have recently [last night] taken it upon myself to go through the fridge on Friday nights.

Last night I arrived at work about 6 o’clock.  Every one else had already gone home for the day.  I worked for a few hours, and then around 8 o’clock I started getting hungry.  I went over to the water cooler [next to the fridge] to get a drink.  While enjoying my refreshing cup of water I noticed the memo on the fridge.  I then had the marvelous idea of how to get free food.  I opened up the fridge and started sifting through Tupperware.  It didn’t look like there was anything good until I my eyes fell upon a shrimp cocktail.

I sat down at the table and opened up the wrapper.  Immediately a stench arose and slapped me square across the face.  ”I think this is old”  I thought to myself.  But just to be sure I reached down and picked up a piece.  Disgustingly slimy.   ”Yeah, that’s definitely bad,”  I recovered it and placed it back in the fridge.

In hindsight I should have tossed it in the trash, but I wasn’t really interested in cleaning out the fridge, I was hungry.

Andrew Nemeth

P.S.  I also should have washed my hands, because when I got back to my desk I started typing on my computer when I realized my hand still smelt like gross/old/nasty shrimp.